My friend, who we’ll call Jennifer, went through another heartbreak yet again. Sadly, it was hardly a relationship at all. The boy never considered her his girlfriend officially, yet she did whatever he asked of her. She gave her heart and body to him in hopes that he would love her in return. He never did, and he trampled her heart as he walked out of her life. This left an even larger hole in her heart, and she found herself pursuing another relationship thus starting the pattern all over again. Can you relate to my friend? If so, you and Jennifer may be able to relate to the Samaritan woman in the Bible more than you realize – a woman whose life was caught up in an endless cycle of broken relationships.
The Samaritan woman was an unconventional woman. Her string of relationships and her life choices made her the object of scorn by others in her time. To make it easier on herself, she went out of her way to avoid people and their criticism. But there was one Person whom she could not avoid. If you are in a similar situation, you may not be able to avoid Him too. He saw your pain, and He saw your thirst for love. He has journeyed far to seek you out. Only He can set you free from your past and current struggles. Even if you think you are the least likely person to be used by God, Jesus has a plan for you, and you are just who He needs for His Kingdom!
The Unconventional Woman
The story of the Samaritan woman began when Jesus, tired from a long journey, sat down by a well. Jesus was waiting for someone in particular – one who was especially chosen and whom He sought out. He and his disciples were on their way to Galilee, and in John 4:4 says, “He had to go through Samaria.”
According to Bible commentaries, while many Jews avoided Samaritans (the Jews considered them as inferior), Jesus chose to go through Samaria not because of travel needs but because the people of Samaria needed a Savior. He was on a mission; but first He needed someone who was willing to become His ambassador to deliver His message. A male public leader, or perhaps a mayor of some sort, in the town would be a good candidate, we think. A devout Jew? Or perhaps a woman of God, pure and devout?
Surprisingly, Jesus did an unconventional thing and spoke to a woman and asked her for a drink. This person is the least likely of all we think He’d choose for she is an unconventional woman – a Samaritan woman. We will later learn that she is known in her village to have a notorious past.
The Samaritan woman was unconventional in regard to the lifestyle she chose to live. Women at her time came to draw water during a time of day when it was cooler, and they came in groups. She, however, came alone at an hour when the day was hot. This likely implies that she didn’t fit in with the rest of her community; and therefore, she came early to draw water in attempt to avoid the crowd of women – or rather their disapproving glances and sneering remarks – who were to come later.
But Jesus knew when she would come, and He awaited her. When he unexpectedly asked her for a drink, her surprise is evident: “How is it that You, being a Jew, ask me, a Samaritan woman, for a drink?” Jews did not associate with Samaritans; moreover, Jewish men considered Samaritan women ceremonially unclean (John 4:9, AMP Zondervan). Thankfully, Jesus was unconventional Himself in that, although He was a Jew, He didn’t follow the Jews’ unbiblical conduct.
Jesus was not to be put off. He went straight to the point and identified the root cause of her troubles – a dire need in her heart in which only He could satisfy:
Jesus answered her, ‘Everyone who drinks this water will be thirsty again. But whoever drinks the water that I give him will never be thirsty again. But the water that I give him will become in him a spring of water welling up to eternal life.’
John 4:13-14
When she asked for this water, He pointed out first her sin, and we learn the kind of woman she is: “‘For you have had five husbands, and the man you are now living with is not your husband'” (John 4:18). Without much thought to the consequences of her actions, this woman had become reckless. Having had 5 husbands, I wouldn’t be surprised if that was a new record of the number of husbands in her culture! Searching for love and satisfaction in all the wrong places, she had thrown herself from one relationship to the next, and from one marriage to another trying to take her fill in hopes she will find what will truly satisfy her.
Are You Unconventional?
Maybe this story is not too different from yours. Perhaps something happened in your past that set you off on a dark path. And in an effort to mend your broken heart you’ve given yourself from one impure relationship to the next hoping to find that which you crave. After one night, people overheard what you’ve done. Some people were eager to hear and share every morsel of gossip which damaged your reputation. The next thing you realize, other people are casting disapproving glances your way and snickering among themselves. So you stop going to church and avoid church activities altogether.
Nevertheless, the cycle of unsuccessful relationships continues on in your life, and before you know it your life is spinning out of control. You wonder if you will ever find the healing, the freedom, and the satisfaction that your heart longs for.
3 Important Lessons We Can Learn from the Samaritan Woman
1. Jesus is the Only One Who Can Satisfy Your Thirst for Love
The Samaritan woman was impressed by Jesus’ prophetic ability to recount her past marriages, but can you just imagine her reaction when He finally revealed His true identity to her?
In John 4:25-26 writes:
“The woman said to Him, ‘I know that Messiah is coming; when that One comes, He will tell us everything.’
“Jesus said to her, ‘I who speak to you am He.'”
Jesus revealed Himself to her as her Messiah, the Living Water, the Great I am. She need no further convincing. He knew her intimately. He knew everything she’s ever done, but that didn’t stop Him from loving her. So captivated was her heart by Jesus that she left her water jar at the well and went into the city to the people whom she was trying to avoid proclaiming, “Come see a man who told me all the things I have done! Can this be the Christ?” (John 4:29).
Like the Samaritan woman, have you used relationships in your life to try to find that which your heart longs for? When we go to the well of relationships to meet our deepest emotional needs, what Jesus said is true – whoever drinks of this water (earthly relationships) will become thirsty again; but whoever drinks the water that I give him (entering into a relationship with the King of all Kings) will never be thirsty again, and the water in him will become a spring of water welling up to eternal life (John 4:14).
Sister, only Jesus can give you the love that you thirst for. So in your heart, meet Him at the well. He awaits you. He knows all that you’ve done. Nothing is hidden from Him. Still, He loves you with all the mess in your life.
2. His Grace is Not an Excuse to Continue to Sin
At the well with Jesus, what past and current sins would He point out? You see, in order for you to experience His grace and His fullness, you must remove the sin that is keeping you from Him. 1 John 1:9 says, “If we confess our sins, He is faithful and just and will forgive us our sins and purify us from all unrighteousness.” Confession must follow a 180 degree turn from sin.
The woman caught in adultery in John 8 was brought before Jesus. He does not condemn her for her sin, but He gives her a firm command: “And Jesus said, ‘I do not condemn you either. Go. From now on sin no more'” (John 8:11). Today, His command remains. We must leave our life of sin.
Confession must follow a 180 degree turn from sin.
Is the current romantic relationship you are in unhealthy and keeping you from growing in your faith and fully experiencing Jesus? Is He asking you to walk away from it? I know this can be extremely difficult. You won’t be able to do this on your own. But He can give you all that you need. 2 Peter 1:3 “For His divine power has given us everything we need for life and godliness.” Life free from sin is possible! Ask Him, and He will deliver you. He will give you the strength to walk away.
3. God Can You Use You – You are Just What He Needs
Something powerful took place after the Samaritan woman’s encounter with Jesus in John 4:39-42.
Now many Samaritans from that city believed in Him and trusted Him because of what the woman said when she testified, 'He told me all the things that I have done.' So when the Samaritans came to Jesus, they asked Him to remain with them; and He stayed there two days. Many more believed in Him because of His word; and they told the woman, 'We no longer believe just because of what you said; for we have heard Him for ourselves and know that this One is truly the Savior of the world.'"
From one sinful, imperfect woman came a revival. Just because you feel you’ve messed up one too many times or have gone too far, that doesn’t change the truth that God can still use you in a powerful way. Jesus, the Great Shepherd will leave the ninety-nine sheep and go after the lost one until He finds it (Luke 15:4).
The Samaritan woman was never named. Perhaps this is so that you can step into her story and meet Jesus at the well. He has sought you out. He knows all that you’ve done, yet He still has a plan for your life if you trust Him. Only He can truly satisfy your thirst for love. He is at the well, and He awaits you.
